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You don’t want to see Jet Li as a Mummy

August 3, 2008

I really loved the Mummy series… okay, so I loved the first movie because it was so clunky and funny that I couldn’t hate it despite of it’s weaknesses. The Second Movie was a bit lamer than the first, so I had doubts when I heard that the third Mummy is coming.

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But hey, They gut Chinese culture (lovelove after Japanese since far east is major lovelove), and their Mummy is Jet Li man! The guy is simply made of pure awesome and cool.  So how can this movie be wrong?

Well, here’s how I teach you the way of fucking up a movie. It should be pretty hard to do this because you have Jet Li and the Far Eastern setting which are already too much superb, but if you just take a tuna sandwich from Subway and put shit in it, you’ve already won the prize. Beacause everything else added to this movie is just pure shit. Brendan Fraser is weaker than ever, and his character’s son is like the next person to get his name in my Death Note. Okay, the Chinese girl is very cute, but with the line “We can’t be together” she puked into my ears. No No No! Plotholes everywhere, weak story, weak acting… even the British accent can’t make up for what they’ve done to this movie…

I can see that after Rock’s Scorpion King we’ll get a Dragon Emperor movie… who wanna bet?

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