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Max Payne takes Pain to the Max.

November 7, 2008

We all know that making a movie based on a video game is a great idea that will turn out to be the utter shit of the decade. We had Street Fighter back then with JCVD, and it turned out to be stupid. Mortal Kombat was okay, but the second one took everything down with the horrible story and CGI. Then We had House of the Dead from master Boll, which is kinda like the worst videogame movie ever created (it’s actually trendy to talk shit about boll movies, but nothing more coming now). Here we have now Max Payne, which was promised to be a good, or at least decent movie…

…but those who usually talk about the movies, are the people who invest in the production of it. And why would they even tell you that it is the dumbest shit ever? No offence, but never ever listen to Movie Documentaries. Director praises the Actors, actors backpraise the director, and their roles are usually “the toughest” or “most interesting” they had in their life… yeah, well whatever…

Max Payne is a shitty movie. Let’s admit, and let’s all face it, we won’t have decent video game movies in the next years… and no, Prince of Perisa won’t be a good movie, which makes me sad. But let’s roll back to Payne. The Movie is shitty, but has some scenes which are actually pretty good. The hallucinations are quite interesting at some cases, and the scene where (no this won’t be a spoiler, because it WAS in the trailer) Max is running towards a window, and the guy falls out, but we can see as a birdman-thing grabs him and let’s the guy fall. This whole scene in slow-mo was like the most awesome I’ve seen in the last two months. However, the rest of the birdman-fleshing-hallucinated scenes are boring and suck. Characters suck, story is like kissing the dick, but doesn’t suck it at all, and action is lame (sucks too). Camera angles are nice in some places, and the whole colorless world is also okay. But Mark Wahlberg doesn’t really do anything, we don’t get to know the real Max Payne… but still, the cast could’ve been fine, however they gave us Mila Kunis as Mona Sax… utter fail to put a cute little girl under a tough characters skin.

In Overall Max Payne is a “try-to-rent-it” for videogame fans. For film enthuiasts, its a solid “no!” 4 points out of 10 I would say, but only for that one scene

Cool posters, bad movie...

On the other hand, the posters are 10 out of 10.

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